BODY-SLAMMER WINS

Republican Greg Gianforte has won a special election for Montana’s sole seat in the House a day after assaulting a pushy Guardian reporter:

Gianforte’s chances at election victory were threatened by scandal on Wednesday, a night before polls opened, when he was charged with misdemeanor assault. 

He allegedly body-slammed Guardian political reporter Ben Jacobs at his campaign HQ in Bozeman when the journalist approached him with a question on healthcare. 

The Daily Mail proposes Gianforte might have lost except that over half of the ballots were already submitted absentee and could not be changed. Probably incorrect; had Gianforte “body-slammed” the uppity Guardian lefty prior to the start of absentee voting his winning margin would probably have been greater.

Had Gianforte, a robust man, wanted to truly hurt the weedy little hipster, he would have.

 

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